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Posts Tagged ‘Miley Cyrus’

Beau and Arrow – Disney Rules

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010

I learn new things every day. Sometimes they really fascinate me, and I’m going to share an interesting one with you – maybe you can help me grapple with it.

A former professor of mine writes Hollywood-bound screenplays, and is currently writing for a Disney movie that sounded very much like Honey, We Shrunk Ourselves (which was a great series, let’s all admit). It turns out there are specific guidelines which must be strictly adhered to in the writing process. Ready?

1) You cannot mention divorce. In the movie my professor is working on, there is a stepfather in the family, but there is no explanation as to what happened to the real father. Stop. Is this normal?! Divorce rates in the US are at what? 50%? But shhh, don’t tell the kids. Might ruin their movie.
2) Santa Claus exists. At least, you cannot mention anything to the contrary. Let us further disillusion the minds of today’s youth, because Miley Cyrus didn’t do a good enough job.
3) A couple who isn’t married cannot live together. Fine, I don’t mind this one. But still fascinating!

My sister mentioned another one to me that I had never thought of. Use of the word “God” seems to be mysteriously absent from Disney movies. She expressed this in describing the overdramatic and constant use of a mousy “Oh my goodness!”

Anyways, I found this all to be pretty cool stuff.

Other world phenomena to think about:
-Rain jackets without hoods
-Charles Darwin married his first cousin
-People who try to emulate Snookie’s hairdo (like the woman on the train today who had multiple “poofs”)

I am off to Savannah, Georgia for the weekend! My cousin is marrying a southern belle, so a destination wedding is in store. I’ll be back next Wednesday, don’t miss me too much. Hopefully I will have some good Georgian stories to report.

Peace out,

Rachel Lily

From Our Beau House To Yours – An Ancient Secret About Dan Brown

Monday, September 14th, 2009

Tomorrow a lot of people will be reading the new Dan Brown novel, but I will be reading the infinitely more suspenseful Johann Wolfgang von Goethe. And since everyone (I’m not going to specify who falls into this category) will be blogging/reviewing/emailing/conspiring about the new Dan Brown novel, I have a few words for my symbologist-historian-romantic-world-do-gooder-extraordinaire: Goethe.

While this may sound elitist, that is a common misconception — Goethe is for everyone, a hero for everyone who transcends genre. A hero who braves history, critical theory (a.k.a a special kind of symbology), the great mysteries, evil villains, evil Roman Catholic Church (Goethe was a Protestant), and yes, the secret affairs of the heart. Goethe himself (unlike Dan Brown) travels to far and distant European centers to brave the great mysteries of the world and discover the (surprisingly) always-surprising power of love. He even came up with the concept “World Literature.” And unlike Dan Brown, Goethe doesn’t write with so many italicized words and sentences that even serious characters sound like Miley Cyrus.

So think twice before running off to pick up your pre-ordered Lost Symbol at Barnes and Noble, because (and I’m going to let you in on this ancient secret) Goethe would beat Dan Brown’s sensationalized, made-for-movies, MTV video, literary posing in a duel any day. And while this may seem harsh, since Dan Brown is a millionaire, the only sympathy I have is for Tom Hanks’s forehead.

-Nikki-Lee