Happy Thanksgiving, readers! Well, happy early Thanksgiving, anyway. We hope that you will be spending Thanksgiving with the friends, family, and food of your choice. I will be spending the day dreading a shift at the mall on Black Friday.
You’re probably inundated with articles and tweets about Thanksgiving recipe suggestions for the day of, but how about suggestions for what to do with your turkey afterwards? Fortunately, F. Scott Fitzgerald has some tips for you! Of his suggestions, which can be viewed in their entirety here, here are a few of my favorites.
Turkey and Water
Take one turkey and one pan of water. Heat the latter to the boiling point and then put in the refrigerator. When it has jelled drown the turkey in it. Eat. In preparing this recipe it is best to have a few ham sandwiches around in case things go wrong.
Great advice! It’s always good to have a backup plan when you are trying out a new, unfamiliar recipe.
Turkey Mongole
Take three butts of salami and a large turkey skeleton from which the feathers and natural stuffing have been removed. Lay them out on the table and call up some Mongole in the neighborhood to tell you how to proceed from there.
It’s always best to take advice from your neighbors when you’re stuck!
Turkey Mousee
Seed a large prone turkey, being careful to remove the bones, flesh, fins, gravy, etc. Blow up with a bicycle pump. Mount in becoming style and hang in the front hall.
A helpful tip for some festive Thanksgiving day decorations.
And finally, if you’re still trying to get rid of those pesky turkey leftovers, Fitzgerald has got you covered.
For Weddings or Funerals. Obtain a gross of small white boxes such as are used for bride’s cake. Cut the turkey into small squares, roast, stuff, kill, boil, bake and allow to skewer. Now we are ready to begin. Fill each box with a quantity of soup stock and pile in a handy place. As the liquid elapses, the prepared turkey is added until the guests arrive. The boxes delicately tied with white ribbons are then placed in the handbags of the ladies, or in the men’s side pockets.
We wish you a happy and healthy Thanksgiving from all of us at Beaufort! Alternately, if you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving, we wish you a happy Thursday.
-A Little Beau Told Me